Nine (as told through my fast forward button)

With a few notable exceptions (Sound of Music, and more recently A Star Is Born), I'm not a big fan of the no-holds-barred musical. Nine is a big ol' traditional musical with not a lot of character background and a whole lotta signing right up front. But I had to see it, right? Daniel Day Lewis, Penny Cruz, Nicole Kidman, Marion Cotillard & cutie Kate Hudson? C'mon - this is like the sweepstakes of gorgeous people all mashed into one movie!

That said, even a grillion drop-dead actors couldn't get me to stop pressing my fast-forward buttons through the parts that made me embarrassed, which were often and many - so that the actual screentime for this movie at my house ended up being about an hour. Everyone looked good, but after A Single Man, I just couldn't get all the way down with the pseudo-60's Italian styling that clearly comes from the same decade that produced the Pink/Mya/Li'l Kim version of Lady Marmalade. That vid actually seemed more of a core influence for the costumes in Nine, rather than the O.G. Fellini. It's just not kooky enough, dig? If you wanted to make a sequel to Moulin Rouge, you get a B-, as it stands, I give Nine a D+. Let's face it - just Kate Hudson alone, shimmying around in a silver sparkle mini should've kept me interested in this movie. fail.

A Single Man

I knew when Tom Ford made a movie that it would be heartbreakingly stylish, the actors would be inhumanly beautiful, and that every scene would be shot p.e.r.f.e.c.t.l.y, and it was all that. Besides living up to my impossible expectations, any movie that a) stars Julianne Moore and b) Spends about 10 minutes of screentime just filming the application of her eyeliner, to me, is a winner by any stretch.

I don't know anything about the author who's novel was the basis, but the pace and distance from its subjects maybe feels a little familiar if you've read JD Salinger, Truman Capote, and frankly wasn't at all why I was watching this movie. What made A Single Man awesome were single elements combined into a slurry of color, architecture, cars, fashion... mood.

*sigh*

TOP QUOTES FROM MURIEL'S WEDDING

7.) "And you three, what a bunch of cocksuckers!"

6.) "Now, now, now - just a minute - you can't come in here and threaten brides, I don't care how unfortunate, you are!"

5.)"Bill: Did Perry interview for the police force yet?
Betty: Yes but they said he couldn't join because he was too tall."

4.) "We wouldn't want you to spend the entire holiday alone. It's not like in high school where you should feel your not good enough to talk to us."

3.)"Beauty Consultant. I advise women on their lipstick, base and eye liner. (to Japanese businessmen) But you should all know about make-up. Your wives must be geishas."

2.) "You're terrible, Muriel."

1.) "That's because my life is as good as an Abba song. It's as good as Dancing Queen."